That Stinks!
Late the other day, I noticed a white object in the backyard that was moving gently and I assumed it was a fly-way bag from a local store. I assumed it was a bag that had escaped someone’s trash or had been thrown out somebody’s window. As I got closer to retrieving it, I discovered it was not a runaway bag but rather it was a large white skunk. Yikes! All of a sudden my desire to catch the bag and throw it away became a panicky moment with the fear of being impacted by its horrible spray. I backed off and took some pictures and videos so I could show close friends and family members my intimate encounters with dangers. Seven hours later I went to get something out of my car and found myself six feet away from the skunk, again. This time both of us were caught completely off guard and I was wondering if the shock was going to cause a disaster. I decided to back away carefully and not overreact. Experts say that’s the thing that works best when encountering a skunk.
What stinks in your world right now? Your marriage, teenagers, adult children, debt, dissatisfaction at work, increased prices on everything, family demands of the holidays, crazy drivers, or a discontent neighbor?
Try these:
Be aware of your surroundings. Mindfulness is more than a cool psycho-babble word. Being aware of all the little and big things going on in your life keeps you from being surprised and caught off guard.
Enjoy the moment. Sometimes stressful moments are unbelievable and need to cause you to smirk or smile. Being overwhelmed can be negative and at other times deserve a you’ve-got-to-be-kidding response. Tell the story to somebody. They may need to hear it or have a similar experience.
It will always be something. Don’t always wish the situation to disappear. You might wish that all you were dealing with was a skunk as opposed to other crisis you could face. The ongoing stressors of relating to others will always include something that is unpleasant, tense, or challenging. Having a 13 real-old, moody relative, or complaining colleague may be the lesser of two evils.
Be careful not to invite trouble. Sometimes we are our own worst enemies and invite problems or enable the situation with others. The afternoon after I saw the skunk I had emptied a stale bag of popcorn out onto the ground below the bird feeder. The snack was an invitation to something I didn’t want or need - a skunk next to my car. Consider what role you play in encouraging the negative behaviors of other people in your world. You may not intentionally welcome the difficulty but may inadvertently encourage the problem.
Know what to do if there becomes an issue. When you encounter a problem with another person’s choices, a surprise or sudden hurtful action from a relative or coworker, a threatening behavior of another person that is intentional or not, or a personal attack, be prepared with a non-reactive or nondefense response. This protects you initially from making the matter worse. Always have the name of a professional counselor that you can access when trouble is overwhelming or you need a perspective for insights.
Remember, skunks happen!
